Discharged

This afternoon I was discharged. I will stay in New Jersey for three days. If I have no difficulties and thus no reason to return to the hospital, I will return to Ithaca to continue my recovery.

My first return appointment to Sloan Kettering is on November 14th. Yeah, ten days. Seems kinda crazy to go back so soon. Apparently, I need to do a second liver scan test before chemo begins, to be 100% certain no blood vessels from my liver go anywhere other than my liver. I'll have the staples removed from my abdomen and a few other things that currently aren't coming to mind at the moment.

Then two weeks later on November 28th, I return to Sloan Kettering for my first round of the liver chemo (the chemo administered directly into my liver). I will only do only the liver chemo in at Sloan Kettering and I will do the systemic chemo (the chemo administered into my veins) in Ithaca.

Enough talk about chemo. At the moment, I don't want to think about it.

Waiting it Out

It seems that each day here in the hospital has provided me a different hurdle. Once the epidural was removed and I was put on oral pain medication, I went in for a pump test which included liver scan to make sure the pump was working and that all blood vessels led into the liver and only the liver. Well, during the scan it was found I had a rogue blood vessel which ran from my liver to my stomach. If left in tact, the chemotherapy pumped into my liver, would find its way into my stomach and that would not be good.

So on Wednesday evening, I had a catheter injected into my groin artery [good times!] and the doctor found his way to the said blood vessel and blocked it. As a result, I can now undergo the liver pump chemo which is what I came here for. The procedure has a 70% chance success rate, and without a successful procedure, liver pump chemotherapy would not be n option. So, his success was great news.

This morning, my surgeon, Dr. Di'Angelica and his crew took a look at me and decided to keep me a little longer. After my large intestine finally got moving on the Tuesday after surgery, it got sluggish again, due to the no food & drink order for Tuesday after midnight in preparation for Wednesday's procedure. So, I've taken two walks and a variety of things to get the ole bowel moving.

I do look forward to getting out of here, and at the same time, I'm very happy to be under the hospital's care until "things are back in order." So, I'm waiting in out.

Made a Friend

Had a visitor Monday. Otis. Very sweet fella who makes weekly rounds seeing patients.

Feeling Cared For

On Friday morning at 5:30am, Mike & I arrived at Memorial Sloan Kettering Cancer Center. The woman at the desk asked for my name and date of birth as they always do. Then she asked what I was here for. I didn't want to answer. I didn't want to have to say it, to give it life. And, what else was there to do. I told her, "I'm here for a liver resect and the installation of a pump." She nodded agreement, gave me a bracelet and directed me to the waiting room. Every patient in the building is here for one diagnosis: Cancer. The Emperor of All Maladies. Tears started to well up in my eyes. And moments later I was brought in to be prepped for surgery. Standard procedure. On the bed was the gown, the hair net, the anti-slip not-socks and a couple extra blankets. Another feeling of sadness showed up. This again. I'm kind of tired of changing into the surgery clothes. Well, I got changed, joked around shootin' the breeze with Mike, and within 45-minutes, an epidural was implanted in my spine and I was ready to rock-n-roll.

I was in and out of consciousness all afternoon and evening on Friday, nodding in and out of game seven of the World Series. This morning when I woke up (on the 16th floor - exciting for  small town guy like me), I felt the tightness & soreness within my abdomen & chest and I thought to myself, "I really did have liver surgery yesterday. Liver surgery. Damn." I looked at the incisions and felt the hockey puck-size pump

almost exactly parallel to my stoma. No, I would not have guessed I would ever have returned for another cancer surgery. And here I am.

After being awake for an hour or so, I couldn't take more than a shallow breath without having serious pain. It was definitely a bit scary. The only thing keeping me from getting truly scared was that the staff were so calm and cool about it. They changed my medications and soon I could take a descent size breath.

Mike was here with me Thursday and Friday. And my folks arrived on Friday and will stay through Sunday morning. Having loving friends and family available to spend time with me is such a privilege. I get a bit anxious now and again, but for the most part, I feel completely cared for.

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Love Bert

Surgery went well. Feeling pretty wiped out. xo

Surgery has been scheduled for 7:30am on Friday. The sooner the better...

"I must confess, the risk of death takes all the fun out of it." ~ Robert Scholl on Cancer