Thursday, June 28, 2007

Update /Reflection

Today was a tough day. It was a nice day, but it was tough. It seems someone drown not too far up stream from us this evening. That hit me a little harder than I would have guessed. Maybe I'm just a little more present to my mortality lately. Or maybe it's because drowning victims don't exactly get an opportunity to turn things around. And maybe I have no idea why I was so saddened by it...

Well, after we found out, I went back to dinner. Yeah...dinner. That wasn't easy this evening. The Gerson Therapy includes a very limited choice of foods with two items that are a must with every lunch and dinner: baked potato and a special soup - with every lunch and dinner. And then I have a choice of vegetables, but with my stomach problems, my limited choice of vegetables is even more limited. So, lunch and dinner has been a little difficult lately. And, I remind myself once again that I can have all the pizza I want as long as I'm willing to do traditional therapy - chemo, radiation... Hmmm..more soup please. Okay, maybe not more, but what I got will do.

Until an hour later and I smell Cal's nachos cooking in the toaster oven and the cheese has begun to melt to the point that its starting to get crispy. Oh, what a delicious smell. It was round two without that comfort food and I felt a little beaten. Any comfort was going to come from within or not at all and I wasn't feeling it. Well, I got back on the couch and watched the rest of a Townes Van Zandt documentary I had been watching earlier and fell a little more in love with his lyrical mastery. Then I read a few pages of Lord of the Rings to Cal and off he went to bed. Now it's my turn. Good night.

2 comments:

  1. stay with it, robby! eye on the prize, eye on the prize...

    also, is there any way you can mentally decide that unhealthy food is disgusting and unappetizing? i do this a lot and it works really well. i know you're situation is extreme, but maybe it could help. ??

    xoxosteve

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  2. Hey Bert,

    You are an inspiration! Plus, your writing is so refreshingly honest and humorous.

    Thanks so much for sharing your life experience with us.

    Love,

    Ernie from ROC

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