An Conversation Worth Mentioning

I forgot to mention an experience we had with the hematologist aka my chemotherapy doctor.

When we first met with him, he asked what I had been doing for treatment since I was diagnosed one year ago. I told him I was doing the Gerson Therapy and he replied saying he believes that alternative therapies are going to start showing up more and more. Then he asked how to spell Gerson and said, "it's nothing short of miraculous that the cancer did not metastasize, so what ever you were doing must have been doing something." Following that meeting, I met with a nurse and Daniela had another opportunity to speak with him some more. She later told me he repeated numerous times how amazed he was that the Gerson Therapy had kept the cancer from metastasizing.

It was pretty sweet to hear these words from an oncologist because the last time I met with an oncologist, he and his intern looked at us like we had three heads when ever the Gerson Therapy was mentioned. Or they did what they hoped would be perceived as polite head nodding, all the while their faces fighting to hold back expressions of terror. Yeah. So, it was nice to receive such a positive response from him.

However, at my last meeting with him, he asked if I plan on sticking around and doing the treatment - as if at this point, I'm going to jump ship. I'm thinking to myself, "I just had a port surgically implanted in my chest. Do you really think I'm going to just skip off to Mexico again?" Mind you, that was what I thought, not what I said. I told him I plan on sticking around and from there he determined the appropriate chemotherapy treatment.

A New Chapter

This morning I had my first radiation treatment. All went well. However, wouldn't you know I will have to drop my pants every time I have radiation? Today they even took a couple pictures of my behind. Of course that was to confirm the settings were correct. It couldn't have been elbow cancer, huh? Had to be rectal. In all honesty, dropping my pants is the least of my worries. However, it is fun to joke about. I had the radiation staff laughing with me this morning.

This afternoon, in preparation for the chemotherapy, the skin covering my Port-A-Cath was sprayed with "skin freezing" liquid so I wouldn't feel the pain when it was pierced with a pretty heavy gauge needle. And it worked perfectly. All I felt was some pressure. Then a line from a little electronic box was connected and the chemotherapy began to be slowly pumped into my system. Pretty cool, knowing this stuff doesn't have anything good to say to any cancer cells it runs into. I felt slightly "off" once the stuff was in me, but nothing I could really put a finger on.

It was about two hours later when I felt some nausea. I took a dose of Compazine which was provided to me this afternoon to take in case of nausea. It took the nausea away and it knocked me out for about 5 hours, minus a few minutes in the midst of it all where I was awake enough to eat my dinner. Next time I'll try some ginger tea first and see if that works. Sleeping the next nine weeks away is not what I had in mind.

Choosing

Last night was an odd nights sleep. I swear I woke up every 45 minutes to an hour. And then I would slowly fall back asleep only to do it all again. I think it may have been a result of the morphine in my system without enough water. The stuff dehydrates me. And in the midst of last nights sleeplessness, I felt a very slight dehydration headache - the kind I used to get when I first started taking morphine. I already have a humidifier. So, I'll drink more water this evening and see how it goes.

My dreams have been a bit...well, violent lately. I'm the kind of person that has epic dreams. I dream for what seems like hours with the story constantly changing and growing. In my dreams of the last few nights, I have been doing my best to stay out of the way of some real tough cats - often with blades or razors in their hands. These are some real serious hoodlums and they mean business. I've steered clear of them each night, but I must say I'm getting a bit tired of running. Tonight, if I remember to, I'm going to let them know whose dream this is and it's going my way whether they like it or not. I learned that technique from my brother Kiff when I was a kid. But I only ever remember to use it after a series of these types of dreams.

I imagine it also has a lot to do with the new direction I am taking and any concerns I have about my own health & wellness, not to mention the surgery which will happen in the late summer. I noticed I have felt a bit cornered or forced to do this conventional treatment. I haven't chosen it yet. I learned a handful of years ago that until I "choose" the path I am on, whether or not I feel like I have a choice, that path will occur like a burden. And the reality is, I do have a choice and I have chosen this path. So, I'll do some work on that tomorrow and get myself in a healthy frame of mind. And then "choose" this new direction.

One More Thing

Thank you for all of your wonderful comments you have posted. It means a great deal to me to receive them. I love knowing I have your support!

The Missing Piece

As I lurk around this oncological world and try to find a comfortable space inside of it all, I oddly find myself looking forward to the radiation and chemotherapy. The intention of these treatments are to shrink the tumor and tumor shrinkage will hopefully equal less pain. It's a strange thing to be looking forward to something I spent so many months so opposed to. I suppose for many people with cancer it must be an odd love-hate relationship.

Well, I am still edging my way into this world...baby steps. I feel good about how my body will respond to the treatment and I am always looking for ways to make it easier. When I decided to be treated at Guthrie instead of Cancer Treatment Centers of America, I was clear there was a piece missing for me that needed to be fulfilled and that is the Naturopathic approach. Fortunately, a friend brought over a copy of a book entitled How To Prevent and Treat Cancer With Natural Medicine written by four authors, one of which is Timothy Birdsall who is the head Naturopath for all of the Cancer Treatment Centers of American throughout the country.

That same day Daniela happened to find our own copy of the same book. What Daniela found in this book are a list of the supplements necessary to prepare the body before, during and after chemotherapy & radiation. We were so excited. Then our friend (and neighbor) researched the most favorable forms of each supplement and which retailers have it available. That was a lot of legwork and we are quite grateful for all she has provided. And, we have a friend who is related to Timothy Birdsall and we hope to get Mr. Birdsall's input regarding any updates or supplement changes that are relevant to my diagnosis. Keep your fingers crossed!

So, now that I am no longer taking the many Gerson Therapy supplements I took daily for 10 months, I am on another whole slew of supplements. As funny as that is, I am glad and grateful to have these supplements available to me. As I am sure you can imagine, I am very much looking forward to as easy a ride as possible over these next 5 1/2 weeks of chemo and radio therapy. And what ever can be done to make it easier for me, I will do diligently. Now I just hope this Port-A-Cath heals up in time - Tuesday is not that far away!!!

Port-A-Cath Time!

How's that for a photo???

It was a cell phone photo taken by one the gals prepping me moments before I was put under to have the the Port-A-Cath installed .

So yeah, I had the Port-A-Cath installed yesterday afternoon. The surgeon told me I would not remember the process because they give me drugs that have an amnesia effect. And then he began to explain what the surgery would entail and what my experience would be. Well, that kind of threw me. If I'm not going to remember it, then why are you telling me? Then it dawned on me that I wouldn't forget the experience until after it happened and therefore it's best to know what to expect as it's happening. That conversation kind of looped my brain around itself - at least for a second or two!

Between the surgeon and his staff, I must have asked them at least 25 times to tell me I was not going to remember anything. All I kept thinking is this man is about to cut holes in me. And I have never had any kind of surgery before, so it was some what of a big deal to me, even if it was a simple out-patient process.

Following the procedure, the nurse asked if I was taking anything for pain, since she expected I may need something once all the surgery drugs wear off. I told her I was taking morphine to which she replied, "Okay. I was thinking something along the lines of Tylenol. I'm sure you'll be just fine." We both laughed. And the morphine definitely helped.

It wasn't until late in the evening that I really started to feel some pain. I took my scheduled dose of pain meds and quickly fell asleep. First thing this morning, the pain wasn't too bad and now it seems to be less and less painful as the morning progresses.

Guthrie Hospital

On Monday March 31st, we went to Guthrie Hospital in Sayre, PA and met with Dr. Cagir as planned. He said that if he had his choice, he would have me receive my chemotherapy and radiation treatments at Guthrie Hospital so he could have complete control over everything. He had a concern about practitioners out of his reach not complying with his recommendation and reducing the possibility of the procedure going less than perfect.

Dr. Cagir made it clear he would oversee all treatment that I received at Guthrie Hospital should I choose to work with him. It was that type of colleague-t0-colleague relationship that had me so impressed with Cancer Treatment Centers of America. So, after a short conversation with Daniela, I decided I will work locally (or at least relatively locally) with Dr. Cagir at Guthrie Hospital. I was very happy to hear the confidence in the voices of Dr. Cagir and Dr. Allerton (my chemotherapy doctor), when both told me they believe my chemotherapy and radiation treatments will shrink the tumor significantly and make the surgery a much easier process.

Today Daniela & I met with Dr. Ho, my radiation doctor, and he presented his recommended treatment of five to five and a half weeks of radio therapy. I was then CT scanned and tattooed for the radiation treatment. The radiation and chemotherapy are both scheduled to begin on Tuesday.

As far as my chemotherapy treatment is concerned, I opted to go with 5-FU which is an intravenous application. The pill form is available to me, however the pill form includes a small risk of red, irritated and/or peeling, blistered skin on my palms and soles of my feet. Apparently, the odds of such a reaction are low, but considering my system is sensitive and I tend to experience the less common side effects, I opted, as stated. for the intravenous method.

In order to keep my veins from looking like overly used pin cushions, I will have a port attached to my body - beneath the skin and just under the collar bone - on Thursday. This port is about the size of a quarter, only thicker, and will allow me to receive chemotherapy treatment 24/7, so I don't have to have an intravenous hook up taped to my hand which would 1) require me to receive continual chemotherapy treatments 5 days a week and 2) require me to have the intravenous hookup changed every week or so.

It still feels a bit strange to be typing an entry about my chemo and radiation treatments. Not for long I suppose!