Sunday, June 15, 2008

Three Days From Now

So, Wednesday I will go in for another round of chemotherapy. I am not looking forward to it. And, most folks who receive the chemotherapy I'm on receive a total of twelve treatments. I will only receive three and this Wednesday is my third treatment. In that regard I should consider myself fortunate.

Following Wednesday's treatment, I will spend six days feeling like hell - if I'm lucky. Following the last two treatments, I felt poisoned (I still haven't figured out quite how to describe it), had random but consistent bouts of flu symptoms - specifically, aching joints and muscles - serious lethargy and chemo-brain. Chemo-brain is a term that staff and patients alike use to describe the way the stuff makes your brain feel. Fried. Extra-crispy. I have difficulty with short-term memory and I feel as though I have been sedated which leaves me feeling anxious and uncertrain.

Another symptom showed up following my last treatment. I would feel cold, so I cover myself with a blanket and in no time I feel over-heated and have to remove the blanket. It's back and forth over and over until the symptom goes away. It happens when I'm awake and wakes me up when I'm asleep.

So, I will enjoy the next two days of comfort - now there's a relative statement, huh? - and play a little more with Beau, because come Wednesday, all my fun will be over for a little while. And more chemotherapy until once I recover from surgery. And recovery from surgery will be a minimum of six weeks, so that's pretty cool. That means no more chemotherapy until some time in September. And that chemotherapy treatment will be determined following my surgery. Getting a first hand look at the tumor will provide my doctors with the information they need to determine what type of chemotherapy I will receive. Let's hope it's something easy. Yeah, Doc. Give the easy chemo, would ya?

1 comment:

  1. Bert,

    I have no words of wisdom on anything today, but I read your post, and I identified with that feeling about knowing chemo is coming... we need to live our cancer treatment one day at a time, but when we know the next round is coming and we know it will be difficult... It's all about balance.

    I was also sorry to read that you have to have chemo after surgery. I was really hoping you would be done and cured without any additional treatment. But, since being cured is the whole point, I know you will find some way to ride it out.

    Luckily, you only have to live through treatment and the subsequent recovery one day at a time - that's how I have been trying to do it, and most days it works.

    Maria Brown