Reflection

Two times Saturday and once on Sunday, I noticed a passing thought that hadn't been around in a while: "This cancer is a bunch of $#*%." At first I was a bit surprised at a clear and direct negative thought in my mind and then I realized...of course it is.

The #1 thing right now is what a difference it has made for me to slow down and listen to my body and to do what works for me. As long as I can remember, I have always pushed myself beyond what feels right so I can have my life go the way I want it to, regardless of what might be the healthy choice. My health has almost always come second to anything I want. Recently, I have taken on listening to my body; when it's time to rest, I rest. When it's time to eat, I eat.

Now for some people, this "new way of being" of mine seem blatantly obvious, like, "Why wouldn't you do what you need to do???" Well, I just didn't. That was how I lived and it worked relatively well. However, with my current choice of therapy, it's REST YOUR BODY OR YOU DON'T HEAL. And being forced to do what's best for my health has gotten me to actually the difference it makes to do what serves me best. Granted I've got a little something at stake at the moment...and I've begun to start a very old habit of my health being my #1 PRIORITY. Oh and by the way, this cancer is still a bunch of $#*%.