Tuesday, May 8, 2007


This first entry is introspective: where I have begun to look...

Today is May 7th and I'm getting very excited about all you wonderful folks who will be seeing me off at the benefit on the 12th. I'm just as excited about going to Baja Nutricare and beginning the process of detoxifying my body.

As I have been reflecting upon this experience day by day, I have been inquiring into what is available to me out of having these cancer cells growing in my body. After the initial shock, the anger, the incredible sorrow and the sense of powerlessness I felt, I was able to begin looking at the purpose of my body having cancer - something that puts such fear into so many of us. I stopped asking "why?" Naturally I have no idea. But, I am clear that I have been provided with cancer - not stricken with it.

Today it occurs as a wake-up call as well as an incredible opportunity for me to take on the health of my body and my mind (something that I usually sacrificed for the great taste of cheeseburgers and milkshakes). On that note, one thing I've come to realize is that some folks will enjoy cheeseburgers and milkshakes up into the final days of a very long life. I, on the other hand, and clearly others as well, do not have the privilege of such gastronomic pleasures. So be it.

I am also clear that nothing of this magnitude occurs in my life without me transforming who I am in some significant way or another. Already, I have made huge strides in humbling myself and asking for the support of others. In the beginning, it took everything I had just to tell a single person that we were having a benefit. And how the world occurs to me today vs. two months ago is very, very different. I have come to learn that people truly love having an opportunity to make a difference in the lives of others. How do I know that? SO MANY PEOPLE have gone out of their way to make this benefit happen by contributing in countless ways - people I have never met and probably never will. I do not live in the same world that I lived in two months ago and I'm clear the world hasn't changed a bit - I have.

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